A night in the life of Lisa…

My child does not sleep through the night. Ever.

Neither do my dogs. I know, it’s ridiculous.

Some nights I feel like I spend more time out of bed than I do in it. I know that’s an exaggeration, but at 3:30 in the morning….



12:50am – (Kaela)- “wa, wa”

12:51am- (Me)- thinking I will ignore it and it will stop

12:52am-(Kaela)-“waaaaaaaaaaa, AHHHHHHHHHHH,WWWWAAAAAA”

12:53am-(Me)- out of bed pouring milk into a sippy cup, shoving it in her cry-hole and searching for the pacifier in the dark… shoving that into the aforementioned cry-hole, putting the milk back into the fridge, tiptoeing back to bed trying not to wake the whole street with my creaky floors.


3:16am-(Oscar)- “cry, cry, cry”

3:17am-(me)- rolling over trying to pretend he was just talking in his sleep or that I was dreaming.

3:17am-(Devon)- sleep, dream, snore

3:18am-(Oscar)- “mmm, mmmmm, let me pee, let me pee” (okay, maybe he doesn’t really say that, but it sounds like it)

3:19am-(Me)- jumping up to let the dumb dog outside so he doesn’t wake up the baby.

3:20am-(Kaela)-“Waaaaaaaaaa, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa”

3:21am-(Me)- “you stupid dogs, LAY DOWN, SHUT UP *$#$&%#$*%#”

3:21am-(Devon)- sleep, dream, snore

3:22am-(Me)- going into Kaela’s room, finding pacifier again- it’s always under her back or her neck, shoving it into her mouth, creeping back to bed.


4:50am-(DOGS)- “Cry, cry, feed me, feed me”- they don’t understand daylight savings time and think it’s time for breakfast.

4:51am-(me)- “SHUT UP!!!!”- in a whispering yell.

4:55am-(DOGS)- “Cry, cry, feed me, I’m hungry. Feed Me!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

4:56am-(Devon)- sleep, dream, snore

4:56am-(me)- get out of bed again so the dogs don’t wake up the sleeping monster-child and feeding them so I can put them outside and get my last hour of sleep.

5:05am-(me)- tip-toe back to bed past Kaela’s room and lay there for 20 minutes trying to get back to sleep.


6:05am- (Alarm clock)- “beeeeeeeeep, beeeeeeeeeep.”

6:05am- (me)- hitting snooze as fast as I can and look over at Devon and think about dumping a bucket of cold water on his face.

6:05am (Devon)- sleep, dream, snore.

6:15am- (Me) give up, decide to get revenge later, getting out of bed to get ready for work.

And… scene.


One Response to “A night in the life of Lisa…”

  1. 2012, the Year of No Sleep! « Says:

    […] drinker. I would have it occasionally before, but now, it is a requirement. I know Kaela had some sleep issues, but nothing like my little […]

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